Being In Love & What That Looks Like

You know I hear people say that they are "in love" so much these days, that I wonder if they actually know what they are saying. Do people really know what it means to be "in love"? Kids say it (younger and younger it seems) and get all starry eyed and think that this "love" thing is this feeling that will last forever. Yeah, well I hate to tell you, that's the lie. Now before you label me a heretic and want to take me out and stone me, I'm not saying that love doesn't last, because it does. What I'm saying is that mushy, touchy feely stuff doesn't last.

There is a little pea size gland in our brains that secretes a chemical that causes us to have that "in love"feeling. It usually lasts anywhere from six to eighteen months, then it shuts off and stops pushing that stuff into our bloodstream. This is why people will one day wake up and think, why'd I marry this person? They're weird and smell funny in the morning. I think that God uses this little gland to trick us into getting married, because if we really knew what all was going to be required of us in this thing called marriage, we'd probably not get involved with it.

There is a scene in the movie Shall We Dance where the wife has hired a private detective to follow her husband and she decides she is going to call it quits with the investigation and the two are discussing what love is, it is a very powerful scene, here is what she tells the detective about what she thinks marriage is:

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness'."

That line gets me every time, because of the truth of it. I am a witness to the life that my bride and I share. And every little detail of our lives do not go unnoticed because we are there to be the witness to each other's lives. We are the ones who tell each other that we matter, that our place here on this Earth is important if for no other reason than for each other. That is what love is, being there for your spouse through the good times and the bad times.

The Bible talks about love as a "doing something for others" thing. Love is not this feeling that you have for one another, that's part of it sure, but love is giving your life for your spouse. Love is doing those things that maybe you don't really want to do, but you do them anyway. And not so that you can get something, you do them because you love. Love is an action word, not a feeling. God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. (John 3:16) He gave to us so that we might learn and give to others.

I think it's cute when a young couple is in love and they are feeling all those heightened emotions and the hormones are raging. I, too remember those times and still have them from time to time, but the better part of love, that is the times when I do things for my bride because I know that it will bless her in some way. Not so I can get something from her, I just want to do things for her because that is how my love is expressed.

I think if we would all take that to heart and love because we love, not so that we can get something, we would go a lot further in our relationships and then actually begin to love the way that God wants us to, sacrificially. Get 'em up folks, let's go out and whip something today for the Kingdom!

Writer's Block and the Frustration It Brings

There are times when I want to write like you just can't imagine. I mean I feel an idea begin to form upon my mind, and I'm ready to start writing things down for all of posterity. And then it happens, the words that so quickly came to my thoughts vanish like wisps of smoke through my fingertips.

It is in these moments that I wonder why God gave me this ability to put thoughts together into the written form. I find writing to be very therapeutic. In a way it helps to focus the ramblings that travel inside my brain, and brings understanding to me as well.

Yet in those times when the words seem to fail me, I sense a fleeting moment of uncertainty and wonder why I even try. Then like a flash the words will return and I start writing again. There is almost a love/hate relationship with this, but I so love to write that I continue to go on with it even when writer's block and frustration come knocking on my door.

Get 'em up folks, let's go whip something for the Kingdom!

Jesus Christ and the Stuff He Did

I think about a lot of things throughout the course of my day, and usually do most of my blogging during the early morning hours. But something that I've been thinking about today is Jesus and all the stuff that He did while He was living here on this planet.

One of the biggest revelations that I received from the Lord in the last year was the fact that when Jesus was here, everything He did was as a man, and not as God. He operated in the supernatural all the time, but it was never as a Deity, it was as a flesh and blood Jewish man.

One of my favorite things to read about Jesus doing in the Gospels is after healing people He would send them to the Pharisees and have the healed person do what the law said according to Moses.
Jesus would basically thumb His nose at the religious leaders and confront their hypocrisy every chance He got. Personally I think it was fun for Him, but that's just my take on it.

The reason that this is so cool, is that it shows me that I can do that too! So let's get 'em up friends and go whip something for the Kingdom!

What Are You Worshipping?

I was doing my daily Bible reading today and came across this verse of Scripture in the Message translation: Exodus 22:20, "Anyone who sacrifices to a god other than God alone must be put to death." Wow! Now what if we were actually living by this today? Could you see the headlines in the paper; Another 10,000 People Put To Death!

I mean seriously, you've seen it too, people for the most part are sacrificing to other gods all the time. There's the god of sports, fashion, entertainment, business, money and selfishness. Truly there are too many to list here, but it is really easy to get busy and forget God in the day to day if we don't pay attention to what we're doing.

Take for instance, you read in the Bible that a man that doesn't provide for his family is worse than an unbeliever, (1 Timothy 5:8), so you go to work, and you work hard to provide for your family. But as the years pass on, you end up working more and more, and while you are providing for your family you really end up sacrificing them at the altar of money, because you are more about making the money than you are about your family.

I experienced this in my life to a small degree. I used to work long hours at the shoe store, working and working. At one point I was working every Wednesday night until 7pm, and ususally didn't go to church on that night because I couldn't show up to church on time. Until one day, my oldest son asked me, "Daddy, are you ever going to go to church with us on Wednesday nights again?" I started closing the shoe store at 6pm on Wednesdays the very next week. I refused to miss one more week of church attendance with my family, regardless of what might come of my businesss. I'm happy to report that I didn't see any significant income loss because of my decision.

We are only given so much time on this planet, and do we really want to spend it worshipping things that are going to go to dust as well? Maybe if we were to implement this Scripture into society again we'd see less people focusing on the wrong things, and more people worshipping God...wouldn't that be great?

Well get 'em up folks! Let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom today!

X Always Marks The Spot

If you've lived in the United States for any length of time, then during the Christmas holiday you have probably noticed that many people will shorten "Christmas" to "X-mas". A lot of people (myself included) don't like the shortened version and say that it is an attempt to secularize the holiday and take Christ out of it. But did you know that the letter X in the Greek language is actually the first letter in the Greek spelling of Christ? Look here:

The greek letter Chi ('x') is the first letter for the greek word for Christ, Xristos.

I remember a particular scene in the third Indiana Jones movie where Indy is telling his class that archeology is a lot of hard work digging in the earth, and that X never ever marks the spot. Of course later on in the library that is proven wrong to him and is a comedic moment in the movie.

I decided that I needed to blog this morning, to kind of get my mind rolling after having read my Bible and drank my coffee, and the thought came to me that "X" never marks the spot. (Don't ask my why that particular thought came to my mind, some times I just hear pirate words.) I thought back with fondness to Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, my personal favorite movie of the Indiana Jones series, and thought I'll just title my blog, "X Never Marks The Spot".

As I typed that, my spirit prompted me to look up what the letter "X" meant in Christianity and I found the definition I wrote earlier. It was at that point that I decided that I would change the title to "X Always Marks The Spot". And what I mean by that is, if you are a Christian then "X" marks the spot on your heart, and it always will. If "X" represents Jesus, then that is where you will find Him, in your heart.

But how many of us need to unearth that "X"? How many of us have allowed the "X" in our heart to be covered over with things of the world? Maybe each day we should become an archeologist and unearth what lies hidden in our heart? It's just a thought, hopefully one that will provoke you to take a little inventory and see if the Jesus in you is being overlooked because it's been a while since He was unearthed in your heart.

In the parable of the soils, (Matthew 13:1-23, Mark 4:1-20 & Luke 8:4-15) Jesus gives us an example of four differing types of soil that we can find our heart's condition to be in; beside the road, gravel, in with the weeds, or rich, good soil. It is based on these conditions as to what type of harvest will grow in our lives. We can't blame the seed (God's Word), we can't blame the sower, we can only blame the type of soil, and that is where we come in.

We need to till up the soil of our heart, so that we are ready to recieve the seed (God's Word) and let it produce in us the harvest that Jesus truly wants to see in our lives. We must take a hard look at our life and see what state our heart is in, and remove whatever is lingering there that is hindering God's Word from producing in our lives. Remember, "X" does mark the spot for a Christian. So get 'em up, let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom today!

Live Ready!

Most of us use some form of planning device to help make our days a little more organized and so we can get the most out of our time here on Earth.

We each only get twenty-four hours a day, and most of the time it seems to me that I'm chasing my tail, trying desperately to fit it all in. But as I'm sure you know even the best laid plans never anticipate the unknown challenges that seem to crop into our daily routines.

And that brings me to the thought Joe McGee stirred in my mind as I listened to one of his messages on the family this morning. I'm never able to pencil in my daytimer when the devil comes against me. He just never let's me know when he's going to attack. And truthfully, wouldn't that be great? To know the date, time and place when he is going to start messing with us? Like for instance, today, January the twenty-fifth, at eleven fifteen in the morning Beelzebub, the enemy of mankind will begin an assault against your mind, write it down so you won't forget and be caught unprepared.

This may be one of the reasons that the Apostle Paul admonishes us to live ready. (2 Timothy 4:2) We do need to plan our lives daily, but we need to be ready for anything as well. That way we are not caught off guard when the enemy shows up knocking at our door. And it seems to me that so many people are shocked when they find the enemy harrassing them. They say things like, "Why is this happening to me?" "What did I do wrong?" "Doesn't God love me and want the best for me?"

Joe said in the teaching today, that when he was at his first church staff position, the Senior Pastor invited him into his office and said, "Joe, there are only two times when the devil will mess with you, now write this down. The devil will mess with you when you are out of the will of God." Joe said he wrote that down, then asked, "What is the second time Pastor?" The Pastor's reply was, "When you are in the will of God." The Pastor sat back and laughed, and laughed and laughed.

The truth of the matter is that even though he was joking with Joe, it is the truth. It doesn't matter whether you are in or out of the will of God, the devil is going to mess with you, and it will almost always be a the most inopportune time too! We must live ready, in and out of season as Paul told Timothy. And we shouldn't be surprised when the attacks against our lives come either.

The way that you will be prepared for the enemy, is by reading God's Word and doing what it says, (be a doer of the Word), praying in the Holy Ghost, and walking in love towards everyone you meet. The enemy may show up at your door unannounced, but that doesn't mean you don't have to be ready for him. Get 'em up folks, let's go whip something for the Kingdom today!

Til Death Do Us Part

*Disclaimer*
I am writing this blog from a man's perspective (since I'm a man that is the only perspective I can use). Just thought you'd like to know that....

It seems that in the last year, I have seen more marriages on the brink of destruction than I can ever remember. And most of those marriages are what you would deem "Christian marriages". That is something that always makes me scratch my head and go, "Huh?" I mean, as Christians we have been born again, our spirits are made alive unto God. He gives us His Holy Spirit to indwell us and on top of that gives us His Word that shows us how to live, and yet Christians are divorcing at a rate almost equal to the world.

George Barna, of The Barna Group directed a study and noted that Americans have grown comfortable with divorce as a natural part of life.

"There no longer seems to be much of a stigma attached to divorce; it is now seen as an unavoidable rite of passage," the researcher indicated. "Interviews with young adults suggest that they want their initial marriage to last, but are not particularly optimistic about that possibility. There is also evidence that many young people are moving toward embracing the idea of serial marriage, in which a person gets married two or three times, seeking a different partner for each phase of their adult life."

According to enrichment journal on the divorce rate in America: The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%. The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%. The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%. So for those who as Barna puts it, are embracing the idea of "serial marriage", this does not look promising for them.

The main problem that I have seen in people who re-marry over and over again is that they bring the same baggage with them. Most of the time they assume that it was their spouse that was the problem, so when they do re-marry they don't make any changes to their own lives, and after a while the same pattern of problems emerge again.

I know that I am generalizing here, but I think I'm more dead on than many would like to admit, but usually the main problem that I see with couples divorcing is for selfish reasons. Those that I know who have divorced, or are at least having marital trouble have to do with the husband not fulfilling his role as lined out by God in Ephesians 5:25 - 29:

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.

The main reason I think that marriages fail, are because men are not doing this; loving their wives like Christ loved the church and "GAVE HIMSELF" for her. In the marriages that I personally know of that are in trouble or have failed, the men have been selfish. For whatever reason, they have placed their needs above those of their wives. And before you say, "Yeah, but maybe their wives were being horrible." I would tell you that is not true, they have very devoted wives who almost wait on their husbands hand and foot.

I have had my own share of ups and downs in my marriage to Cheryl, but I recall making a committment to her over twenty-two years ago. One which brings security to her; that I would love her til death parted us, and I plan on honoring that committment. And this is where it really gets down to it, making a committment and honoring it. Will you do what you said in the beginning of your marriage, or won't you? Are you a man of your word, or aren't you?

Marriage is hard, but if you, as a man, will do what the Lord has laid out for us in the Bible, you will receive huge rewards in your married life. Remember the principle of the Kingdom, whatever you sow you will reap. If you want a good marriage men, then give yourself to see your wife's needs are met, believing God and He will give you such a great harvest you will be amazed!

Get 'em up men, let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom today!

I Am Proud

There are a number of things in my life of which I am immensly proud; my walk with the Lord, my marriage to Cheryl and my children.

I have walked with Jesus for a little over twenty-three years, something that a lot of my old friends said wouldn't last. I recall a conversation that we had shortly after I had been saved, it went something like this. "Dave, listen we're happy for you, we really are. But you tend to get hold of something and run with it until the new wears off, then you go to another thing. So we'll believe it when we see it." That's the gist of it anyway. I am happy to say, that this "Jesus thing" hasn't been a fad, and there hasn't been anything better come along.

I have seen my share of ups and downs in the last twenty-three years of serving the Lord, but after all the dust has settled, I'm still here, and still following and doing my best to be a disciple of all that Jesus taught in the Bible, and what His Holy Spirit is showing me on a daily basis. It's a great life, one that if you have not partaken, I would love to tell you how you can. Just ask, I'll be happy to show you how to get to know Jesus.

Growing up, I remember watching my mom and dad. I can remember thinking that I couldn't wait to get married so that I would have what I saw that they had. I remember the first time I saw Cheryl, at a Carmen concert in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I was with a date, and so was she, but I couldn't help but keep noticing her throughout that concert and wishing that I was sitting next to her instead of the girl I was with. I kept thinking, "Man! She sure is cute, I want to get to know her!"

Well, twenty-two married years and three kids later we've been on a roller coaster of a ride. In this, I've also seen the ups and downs, yet never has the thought of not being with her ever crossed my mind. This girl was my bride over twenty-two years ago, and she still is today. I can honestly say that I love her more today, than I did way back then, and that love just continues to grow as she develops into the woman that God has destined her to be. I truly am a blessed man (as the Bible says in Proverbs 18:22) because she agreed so many years ago to walk the rest of her life with me. I am humbled even as I write that, I can't wait to see what the Father has for us this year.

Children, the Bible says, are a heritage of the Lord. I have been blessed with three of the greatest children ever! I truly believe that. Now if you talked to them, they might say different. Being a father has been one of the most difficult things that I have ever in my life had to do. I mean, it's hard to tell your child that they cannot have something right away and that they will have to delay their gratification til another day. I want to be, as my friend Joe McGee says, "Santa Claus stuck upside down in your chimney!" But there are days where that is just not possible.

I struggled with relationships in my own adolescent years, and now I see the struggles in my own children from time to time and want to help fix it, but there are just some things that you have to learn on your own...so those days I cry out to the Father to help my kids. I've known the satisfaction of hearing praises about my kids from other people, and the sadness of completely blowing it as a dad too.

I've laughed with my kids, and I've cried with my kids. We've hugged, and slapped and pinched each other. We've laughed at funny jokes together, and I've corrected them when perhaps the joke wasn't appropriate, just as they've corrected me too. My bride and I have spent our lives for our kids in an effort to help them, and as they've grown older it has become harder on us to enter the advisory role instead of the we'll fix it role. You know that one, you'll do that because I'm your parent and I said so.

The hardest thing that I have ever lived through was the death of my youngest son, Noah. The reason that this was the hardest thing in my life is because I was unable to prevent him from taking his life. I would have never thought that this would be a place that I would be in life. Not because I'm better than anyone else, I don't believe that, but because of how on fire for Jesus Noah was. He was a soul winner, and a good one at that. I am so proud of the fact that he wanted to win people to the Lord, and await the day when we will be reunited in the presence of Jesus.

I have a very blessed life. My life has had good days and it's had bad days, there have been ups and downs but way more happiness than sadness to be sure. I really don't think that I ever realized way back when just how great my life would be one day. I am a very fortunate man indeed! I'm proud of how my life is turning out and that is a good thing.

Get 'em up people, let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom today!

K.I.S.S.

I made this comment to a friend last night, use K.I.S.S. For those of you who don't know what this means it is an acronym for:
K eep
I t
S imple
S tupid

I was thinking about that on the way to work and decided that if we would adopt this into our daily lives concerning the Kingdom of God we'd go a lot further, with less stress. It's like this;

• God is good, the devil is bad.
• God loves you, the devil hates you.
• If you follow God's commands, you will be blessed. If you follow the devil's suggestions, your life will come to ruin. (maybe not immediately but it will)

Those are some pretty simple things in my opinion, and they so bring a little bit of clarity to my life as well. Well, get 'em up folks, let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom today!

Does This Seem Fair?

I have been reading the parable of the soils quite a bit this year, actually all three accounts every day. Jesus asked the question in Mark's version that if we didn't understand this parable, then how would we understand any of the parables? So for the year 2011, I am endeavoring to understand this parable.

Today as I was reading in Matthew's account I came across this Scripture and it made me go huh? Matthew 13:12 "Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them." I've read that every day now for over a month, and today the "fairness cop" inside of me said, "Wait a minute, that doesn't seem right."

Why is it that I think that you ask? Well, I mean come on doesn't God want the best for all of us? I believe He does, after all Jeremiah 29:11 states; "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." I don't know about you, but Jesus stating that those that don't have, even what they have will be taken from them, doesn't quite add up in my book.

Yet as I pondered this today, I'm reminded of the old adage, "The rich get richer, and the poor get poorer." It is according to what we have and what we do with what we have. Most of the time those that have, do something with it and of course more comes. Those that don't have, are unable to do anything because they don't have, so they end up in a worse place than they started.

The parable of the soils, is a lesson in what kind of heart you possess:

1. Beside the road.
2. Rocky.
3. Thorny.
4. Good.

So if you possess a heart that is hard, like beside the road, the enemy will take any Word of God sown away from you immediately. If your heart is rocky, then the Word sown will only produce until some type of persecution comes against you. If you are the person with the thorny heart, then the cares of the world will hold the Word sown in bondage, and it will be unable to produce. But if your heart is good soil (I like Luke's version "a noble and good heart") the Word sown will produce anywhere from a 30 % to 100 % increase in your life.

So while at first reading this Scripture seems to be unfair, it's not. It is a principle of the Kingdom of God, and I for one am thankful that Jesus pointed it out to us three times in the Bible. (Out of the mouths of two or three witnesses let every word be established) I know now, that I am going to have to till up the ground of my heart to be able to make it like Luke said, "A noble and good heart" that will be able to produce the 30 - 100 % return.

Get 'em up folks, let's go out and whip something for the Kingdom of God today!

Don't Go It Alone in 2011

Brotherhood. The dictionary defines it as; an organization of men who are united for a common purpose. I like to think of it as my life line to sanity. Many of you understood what I just said; others of you will either get it later, or will remain clueless. I hope however, that after you read this, the cluelessness will be gone.

God never intended any of us to walk this life alone. He designed us to need others, after all if He didn’t then why did He say that it was not good for man to be alone? In the story of creation in Genesis, everything He had said up to that point was good, and His declaration about man was that he was very good. Yet just a few Scriptures later He says that it is “not good” for man to be alone.

This however is not what the world and its system would try to tell us. I think of the song by Simon and Garfunkel I Am a Rock. Check out the lyrics to it:

A winter's day in a deep and dark December; I am alone, gazing from my window to the streets below on a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow. I am a rock, I am an island. I've built walls, a fortress deep and mighty, that none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain. It's laughter and it's loving I disdain. I am a rock, I am an island.

Don't talk of love, but I've heard the words before; it's sleeping in my memory. I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died. If I never loved I never would have cried. I am a rock, I am an island.

I have my books and my poetry to protect me; I am shielded in my armor, hiding in my room, safe within my womb. I touch no one and no one touches me. I am a rock, I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain; and an island never cries.

This song paints a poignant picture of a lonely person no doubt, but the saddest part is that it is a self-imposed loneliness. God never intended for us to be alone, even in prison the worst place to be put is solitary confinement. Men in solitary confinement for long periods of times eventually go crazy.

So I wonder why it is that men tend to move towards this going it alone attitude? What is it inside of us that makes us want to be alone, to be isolated from others and to be our own man so to speak? I believe that it is fear. Fear of being found out, fear that we will not measure up somehow to what people and society expect of us, which can I say right here is a trap that we should avoid at all costs.

I know this fear, I have lived it. It is a crushing weight that we allow to hold us down and keep us from forming any real relationships that could in fact help us. When I said earlier that brotherhood is my life line to sanity, I meant just that. I have men in my life that I can go to when things get hard. These men are not just casual friends either, they are men that can and will tell me the hard things that I need to hear from time to time.

The Bible tells us in Proverbs 27:17; ”Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” This Scripture speaks to me of that fact that I need to have godly men in my life that not only have their interests at heart, but mine as well. Having men that will tell me the truth, even if it hurts, is one of the most valuable assets in my life.

Listen we all have struggles, I don’t care how saved you are. Rough times come to us all, and if we choose to go it alone, the enemy will destroy us. One of the worst things I’ve seen in Christianity is this thing of thinking that because we are Word people and are filled with the Holy Spirit then that’s all we need to make it in life. And while we need both God’s Word and His Spirit, we also need people to walk with us.

Don’t listen to the lie that you can do this on your own, you can’t. Find good, godly men to walk with you in your life. Men you can trust with your heart, and the things that you carry in it. The Bible tells us to be a friend, and we’ll have friends. Reach out to those men around you and become their friend, help them with their burdens, and it won’t be too long and they will begin to help you with yours.

Remember, we were never created to be alone, we need people and they need us. Get out there and do some good today and let’s whip something for the Kingdom of God!