The time was around 5:00 PM, and Cheryl had just left the shoe store. I began gathering up all the materials for the night's class in between helping customers at the shoe store. At this point in our lives, Cheryl and I had been married for twenty-one years, and we were a happy couple. With Christ at the center of our relationship, our marriage was a good one and we loved being with each other.
When we first started to date, I remember a conversation Cheryl and I had about our future. We had agreed how divorce was never going to be an option for us, no matter how difficult things would ever get in our lives we were committed to one another and we had both better be sure we wanted to be together forever because there would be no going back. I can't tell you how much knowing you have a committed partner in life helps keep the wolves at bay when the going gets tough.
I haven't always known the will of God for my life. There have been many times in my Christian walk where what I was supposed to be doing for the Lord wasn't really clear to me. But this time was different. I knew Cheryl and I were walking right in the center of God's will for our lives, and I have to say it thrilled me to no end.
I believe it was around 5:30 when my telephone rang and my life changed forever. I saw it was my daughter's number and I answered hello. What I heard made my blood run cold. April was crying/yelling for me to come home, and that something had happened to Noah. Without even thinking, I ran out of the shoe store, pausing only long enough to lock the door, then sprinted across the parking lot to my pickup truck. Starting the engine, and slamming it into gear almost simultaneously, I fish tailed out of the parking lot with white smoke belching from my tires.
To tell the truth, I experienced a fear unlike anything I've ever known. When you hear the phrase "fear gripped my heart", I can tell you it's true. My mouth became as dry as a desert, and I had a difficult time swallowing. I drove like a maniac weaving in and out of traffic, praying as I drove, "Lord let everything be alright." I grabbed my phone from my pocket, and called my friend Terry, explaining to him how something had happened to Noah, and to call our band of brothers and get them praying. Hanging up from him, I called a dear friend in California and asked him to do the same with our online band of brothers. On a side note; I am so thankful for these men in my life who were there for me that day. If you do not have a band of brothers you walk and do life with, I would suggest you find some a.s.a.p. I could not have made it without them.
My driveway which is several hundred yards long seemed to be an never ending path of concrete and asphalt. I thought I'd never get home, when in reality it had taken me less than five minutes, a full five minutes shorter than it usually would take me. I slid to a stop, threw the gear shift into park and turned off the engine, racing towards my house at top speed. My wife and daughter were in tears, saying Noah had hung himself in his bedroom. As my girls went to the front porch to wait on the ambulance, I walked down the hallway towards Noah's bedroom. It was as if I had concrete blocks tied to my feet.
I will just say as I entered my son's room; the place where we'd spent countless hours playing, laughing and doing life, I was unprepared to face what I was about to see. There on the floor of his bedroom lay my youngest son Noah. I ran to his body, dropped to my knees and began to beg God for his life. I prayed harder than I've ever prayed in my life. Not knowing what to do, I laid him back down and began to beat on his chest hoping to jump start his heart I guess, I'm not really sure at this point. I'm not sure how long this lasted, as time kind of seemed to stop for me, but paramedics came streaming into the room and asking me to leave they began to perform CPR on my son.
I went to the kitchen, grabbed a glass and filled it with water. Drinking it down like a man parched from days of walking across a desert, I refilled the glass and walked to the front porch to check on my wife and daughter. They were both in shock, and the looks on their faces broke my heart. I took out my phone and looking up the number for Micah's work, I called and explained to the manager who I was and that there was an emergency and Micah was needed at home immediately.
Within a few minutes my phone rang, and it was Micah asking what had happened. I explained the situation and told him to hurry home, only to be safe getting there. He was understandably upset, and began to express just how upset in a barrage of words at a high decibel. Realizing his need to vent his emotions, I just listened for a few minutes. After I felt he had released enough, I yelled, "That's enough! You've vented, but I need you to be strong for your mother and sister when you get home, so no more." He agreed and we ended our conversation.
A deputy sheriff walked up to me and began to ask me questions. I'm pretty sure I wasn't very kind to this man who was just doing his job, but at the time I just didn't care. As we were talking, one of the paramedics came out to me and said Noah was gone. My phone rang again, and I answered it to hear my Pastor's voice on the other end. I told him what had happened, and that the paramedic had called the time of death. He told me that may be a fact, but the truth according to God's Word was it was up to me, not to a paramedic and to wait until he got there. I asked the paramedics to wait until my Pastor arrived before doing anything else. And I went to comfort my wife and daughter as I waited.
Micah got home, and immediately went to his mom and sister. He was a tower of strength to them, and I can honestly say I have never been more proud of my son. He stepped up as a man, and it was such an encouragement to me, knowing I would not have to shoulder this burden alone. Shortly after Micah arrived, my Pastor and friend Terry showed up. Terry went to be with Cheryl, Micah and April, while my Pastor and I went into Noah's room. He was very gracious and asked the medical personnel if they would give us a moment.
Closing the door, this man of God went to my son's body and began to command life to come back. Up to this point, I never really understood what a Pastor was until I saw mine in action. I sat on Noah's bed and prayed, watching as Heaven was bombarded with prayers and commands of life returning. It is at this point I wish I could say we experienced a miracle and just like the stories in the Bible about people coming back from the dead Noah woke up. But he didn't. After about ten to fifteen minutes (time seemingly stood still) Pastor David looked up at me and said, "David, I don't think Noah wants to come back." I agreed and we left the body with the paramedics so they could do what needed to be done.
By this time the wives of both Pastor David and Terry had arrived as well, and they were talking with Cheryl. The authorities removed my son's body to the coroner's vehicle, leaving us to sort through the myriad of emotions and to try and sort out in our brains what exactly had just transpired in the last hour and a half. I will end today's post with this thought, no matter how bad I've ever had issues with any person who has ever done me wrong, I would never wish this experience on anyone, ever.
Strength and honor for the Kingdom and the King.
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